@HiroRwar | 3,277 followers
American badgers look like they're about to drag you into a back alley and pull a shiv on you to demand money for their meth habit.

European badgers look like they're about to invite you over for a cup of tea and some custard creams at their little cottage in the countryside.

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Total of 366 replies and 717 quotes found
In reply to @HiroRwar
Just look at these 'Wind in the Willows'-ass mfers. pic.twitter.com/YJFEsiIwg5
In reply to @HiroRwar
So true......... European Badgers are so, so, cute! Just finished this drawing today.. Charcoal on Strathmore Art Paper (photo ref. by kind permission of J Palmer). #charcoal #Badgers pic.twitter.com/0F7PJNlxcz
In reply to @HiroRwar
I remember always been really confused by the fact that Friar Tuck in the Disney Robin Hood was a badger, since he looked nothing like any badger I knew. XD
Two kinds of Hufflepuffs.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Then there are our wolverines (which do still exist in Scandanavia), which look like the aliens from Attack the Block pic.twitter.com/NVJd4I7FPF
Suddenly I see American Hufflepuffs in a completely different light...
Lampasas badgers look like they’d get into a fight in the Storm’s parking lot over who can rev their truck the loudest. They’re easily identified in the wild by they’re telltale orange safety vests.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Perhaps a "fairer" comparison pic for Taxidea taxus, the North American Badger. pic.twitter.com/ArtIyjW6nf
In reply to @HiroRwar
Honey Badgers would be the unstable cousin who flips out because you called their name too loud. Picture Tommy DeVito from Goodfellas. pic.twitter.com/BS6yl6IXhj
In reply to @HiroRwar
European Badgers always make me think of salamadastron ❤
In reply to @HiroRwar
It’s because of nationalized healthcare.
While I have accepted people cast me as a European badger, I still wish everyone had cast me as the really pissed off American Badger.
In reply to @HiroRwar
One doesn't simply get invited to a badger's cottage for tea and biccies lad. You have to pass the trials first.
I've been picturing European badgers every single time someone has mentioned American badgers my whole life and only now have I discovered that they're not even in the same GENUS
The truth-telling on Twitter is so satisfying
In reply to @HiroRwar
I always wondered why the Brits protrayed badgers as endearing.
This is a meles meles stan account, taxidea taxus can get in the bin
In reply to @HiroRwar
Sooooo, they're basically one of those ads with the before and after a meth addiction?
In reply to @HiroRwar
To be fair, if you had to endure and Upper Midwest winter outdoors, you’d look like the first guy too.
In reply to @HiroRwar
And honey badger's all, "Calm down, folks, I can do both." pic.twitter.com/l6S6nW8zQ2
I never understood the jokes in American TV shows about badgers being violent and bloodthirsty until now
This explains why the American perception of Hufflepuffs seems so at odds with the European. Proud to be a rip-your-face-off-if-you-harm-my-friends Hufflepuff.
unbelievable profiling, solidarity with all badgers in the face of this
In reply to @HiroRwar
See also my childhood confusion between Hufflepuff’s mascot and University of Wisconsin Madison’s Mascot.
This is why that badger shifter trend did so very poorly over here
In reply to @HiroRwar
So... they reflect their people.
In reply to @HiroRwar
The heck Hiro this tweet went so viral people I went to university with are retweeting it.
In reply to @HiroRwar
American Badgers have seen some shit.
In reply to @HiroRwar
I see and raise you Africa’s most fearless and respected animal: the African Honey Badger. :P pic.twitter.com/qX9iCJEWEI
In reply to @HiroRwar
Badger the american, Goodger the european one :D
In reply to @HiroRwar
And yet, the new headline from years ago 'man savaged by badger requires 117 stitches' was about a European (British) badger. Must have been a grave error of etiquette like pouring milk after tea or taking last custard cream when offered.
In reply to @HiroRwar
American opossums vs. Australian opossums ;-; why can't we get the cute versions, too?
Didn't we warn you about Hufflepuffs when cornered?


In reply to @HiroRwar
Our British badgers on occasion wear a monocle Along with a well cut 3 piece tweed suit.
In reply to @HiroRwar
American badgers look like they could have worked as extra as orcs on Lord of the Rings
Never mind the North Korea stuff, this is why I’m on twitter.
Holy shit is this real? Is this what American badgers look like???
In reply to @HiroRwar
That totally reminds me of the comparison between the American and Australian (O)Possum. I mean, Jesus Christ... 😳: twitter.com/farrahrized/st…
In reply to @HiroRwar
It's the same story for American possums vs Australian possums pic.twitter.com/gh2F1syxuu
In reply to @HiroRwar
As a Brit this really clears up all the jokes from the US about how scary badgers are 😂😂 thought you guys were just being weird this whole time
My friend got chased down the street by a badger in Exeter and had to fend it off with a bin lid.
In reply to @HiroRwar
In reply to @HiroRwar
Meanwhile African Badgers are hunting Oryx pic.twitter.com/pHuDW6w7aK
"Amerikan porsukları, sizi ıssız bir sokakta kıstırıp bıçak çekerek meth parası isteyecek gibi görünüyorlar.
Avrupa porsuklarıysa sizi çay ve bisküvi ikram etmek üzere küçük kırevlerine davet edecek gibi görünüyorlar."
In reply to @HiroRwar
European badgers look like they're about to invite you over for a cup of tea and some custard creams at their little cottage in the countryside... and then nobody will ever see you again.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Well this is the most common badger in my area 😀 pic.twitter.com/BeDs2Q0WNT
In reply to @HiroRwar
Please also consider the American Borbger. A orb badger. pic.twitter.com/CYafjBhAUF
In reply to @HiroRwar
Depends on the author. Brian Jacques has them look noble and proud. Beatrix Potter has them look, well just search for Tommy Brock.
Hufflepuffs don’t play around in the US
This explains a lot of my confusion about badgers. (I'm Canadian. My badgers are the back-alley shiv types.)
This reminds me of Shelly Laurenston and honey badgers. :D
In reply to @HiroRwar
The American badger is my totem! He represents storytellers! Badger’s aggression allows him to dig deep and heal and travel to the land of the dead unharmed. It thrills me to see people noticing them, even if most folks think they’re scary.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Omg it’s so true. It’s because of the Wind In The Willows, I say. pic.twitter.com/mkoPGXmrVt
This is the first time I have ever seen an American badger and just... what did you guys do to them?!
Hufflepuff would have been a VERY different house in the US...
In reply to @HiroRwar
And if they are the badger in @bryan_talbot 's Grandville they beat the hell out of you, shoot you or arrest you :-) pic.twitter.com/jTZO7vemYx
Yeah, but after reading 'Grandville' by @bryan_talbot, I am completely ready to respect European badgers.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Dafuq is that creature on the left
What the heck, America?😳
In reply to @HiroRwar
then the African Honey Badger who looks like its about to sacrifice you to its meat god ... pic.twitter.com/rbMW7tsfwO
This Wisconsinite approves this analogy
In reply to @HiroRwar
You are absolutely right! Lol! I did not know there was a difference between the two, but now I’ll never forget! And yes... American badgers probably do have shivs- I’ve seen them chase and attack vehicles!
Once I was driving on a highway in Montana when a badger stopped in the middle of the road and glared at my rental car so hard I thought I was about to die
In reply to @Scarredaxel
@Scarredaxel ku sil on huono päivä ja ku sil on hyvä päivä
Please never let me see an American badger again in my life
<- European in the streets, American in the sheets
In reply to @HiroRwar
Badgers, Wolverines, Fisher Cats, Pine Martens, Minks - North American Mustelidae don't mess around, unless they're Otters, who are born to mess around.
Both sides of Hufflepuff
The two sides of a Hufflepuff
In reply to @HiroRwar
Hahaha, just RT’d because it made me laugh then spotted the right pic is by my cousin #SmallWorld!
In reply to @HiroRwar
Idk dude I think the American one is too fat to have a meth habit...
In reply to @HiroRwar
This could also be American vs European (name any social program)
In reply to @HiroRwar
Crazy how often this old tweet is rehashed. twitter.com/EmmaBowers/sta…
And both will fuck up your day if you get close enough.
YAAASSSS!!!! I 💚❤️💙💜 badgers - such incredible critters. Love seeing them when hunting or climbing out west (from a distance, they are FIERCE, and I hope have no meth habits). @edpsych42 - for some reason I thought of you! 😄
You should be more afraid of the ones that look like they'd come to tea. Badgers are fuckers.
It all makes sense now. I read a lot of US books & I always thought US authors were just massive wusses re badgers. Turns out, not.
The two Hufflepuff genders
In reply to @HiroRwar
If y'all love dem badgers please consider a donation to the Badger Trust. ♥️ @BadgerTrust (I'm not affiliated with them)
Hey, I don't...don't have a meth *itches* habit. What s-s-slander!
In case you haven't seen it @CorinaontheWynd , there's a whole viral post on badgers going around
Right: Hufflepuff under normal circumstances
Left: Hufflepuff when you've hurt their friend or family
British Badgers are well-dressed thugs while American Badgers are trailer park meth thugs. Both will fuck your shit up, but only one will look sharp while doing it.
In reply to @HiroRwar
Lol that's why as a kid I was always confused each time I watched the Fox and the Hound because I thought badgers were cute but the one in the movie was scary af XD pic.twitter.com/vYGIM3WrX1
I still giggle when I think of the confusion I had to explain to @sfanetti about how Badger (Night Horde) got his nickname.
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