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Analysed 200 tweets, tweets from the last 103 weeks.
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Last 50 tweets from @SamSykesSwears
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
One Christmas my brother played Final Countdown over 20 times to wake us all up at 5 a.m. I do not like Final Countdown. Any time when I did was a kinder, simpler time.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
He... he said "ethnically cleanse". He just said it out loud. To reporters he knew were listening.
Ok, I’ve got one panel then late dinner.
Friends, what am I eating?
Final Countdown.
What can we agree is a song that everybody likes?
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
A little reminder @SteveScalise from your Republican colleague.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
jokes 👏 that 👏 are 👏 okay 👏 with 👏 friends 👏 aren't 👏 always 👏 okay 👏 with 👏 internet 👏 strangers

don't send me aggressive sexually suggestive stuff, or jokes about /actually murdering/ me if I don't know you. how many times must this be said.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Just how dishonest was Gaetz's stunt?

"Among the Republicans who joined the protest, 12 of them are members of the Oversight or Foreign Affairs committees... *meaning they have been allowed to sit in on all depositions held in the SCIF.*"

Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
My favorite ladies. Lightning beau and bloody yasha. #criticalrolefanart #CriticalRoleArt
Like you, I also make sure to leave my horse in fantasy RPGs far away from battle, thus negating most of the use of the horse, because I'm too anxious about them getting hurt.
Isn't it nice how in Breath of the Wild they make sure to mention you get a locally-made bridle and saddle when you register a horse. Link knows that even in the apocalypse, you have to support small businesses.
Those are “Phrygian” pattern helmets, named for the region in what is now western Turkey. They imitated popular hats worn there and popular among Scythian (Sacae) peoples.
Replying to @MykeCole
i used to wear those helmets to get into r-rated movies when I was younger
I know I have a lot of younger people following me, so in the interests of using my platform responsibly, let me just say: you will eventually have to trim your nose hairs way more than you expected you would ever have to. No one will tell you about this. You will be shocked.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Sorkin Zuckerberg: You know, you really don't need a forensics team to get to the bottom of this. If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you'd have invented Facebook.

IRL Zuckerberg: Guhhhh well I think lying is bad (gulp)
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
*George walks into the first circle* George: Well, Jerry, they're sending me to Limbo. Jerry: They're sending you to Limbo? George: Limbo! Jerry: They can't send you to Limbo! George: They're sending me to Limbo, Jerry!
Replying to @SamSykesSwears
Jerry: Hey, Kramer, I haven’t seen you on the fifth circle for awhile. Kramer: Ohhhhh. Fifth circle isn’t where it’s at, my friend. From now on I’m all about the third circle. Sins of incontinence, Jerry, that’s where it’s at. Jerry: I never thought you were a third circle guy.
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
I'd have to be naked every time I fight. I'm shy.
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
What if it's a shitty superpower tho? Like what if it turns me blue and hairy like Beast?
Replying to @wes_chu
Beast got super agility and sticky feet. That wouldn’t suck.
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
Will it give me super powers?
Replying to @wes_chu
i dunno, let's find out
Just found this in the kitchen. That is awesome with two young kids in the house.
Seinfeld's Inferno.
Replying to @SamSykesSwears
*George walks into the first circle* George: Well, Jerry, they're sending me to Limbo. Jerry: They're sending you to Limbo? George: Limbo! Jerry: They can't send you to Limbo! George: They're sending me to Limbo, Jerry!
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Here are the address and phone number of the Cherry Hill Board of Ed, which rejected an outside offer to pay off student lunch debt so kids could participate in things like field trips & prom
45 Ranoldo Terrace, Cherry Hill, NJ 08034
(856) 429-5600…
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
Ok, question then: are we going to get some backstory on the Cacophony? Please?
Hello, friends. I'm on @swordandlaser tonight, being interviewed by a couple of fine, bookish nerds. Since I'll have to shave for this, why not come along and ask some fun questions for me to answer?
Get your questions in now before we interview @SamSykesSwears tonight!…
In reply to @xsarahann
You totally did talk @edenjeangrey and I into it.
Sat down to write, immediately had no idea what I was going to say. That's frustrating, but it happens. Sometimes the answer to it is to sit and contemplate, sometimes it's to get up and move around. My tea just arrived, though, so I'm trapped here.
I don't know what those cats are up to...
But I know they're up to something.

Replying to @WritingMadness
Agents of the Church are everywhere.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Matt Gaetz storming a SCIF to shut down an investigation, Matt Whitaker stating abuse of power is not a crime, and Trump’s lawyer arguing he can’t even be investigated for shooting someone really is the perfect encapsulation of the GOP’s current attitude towards the rule of law.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
The mob of House Republicans had threatened not to leave the House SCIF they occupied this morning to stop witnesses from testifying about the President's abuse of power.

But they just came to the Floor... to vote against advancing legislation to secure our elections.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
.@RepAlexMooney, seen below apparently videotaping as he barges into a SCIF, last year co-sponsored H.Res.907, calling for the appointment of a Special Counsel to investigate why Sec. Clinton escaped criminal charges in connection with her handling of classified information.
Dear @SamSykesSwears - Please stop spying on my anniversary dinner. @stacyking can see you back there. Your moustache is ridiculous.
Love, Jim.
Replying to @JimZub @stacyking
Fancy moustaches are very chic in Paris, Jim
The news today is making me salty as the dickens. But I just found out that the family down the street has two French bulldogs they like to walk at the same time I like to walk so things are looking up.
if I had two French bulldogs, I’d name them Roast Beef and Potatoes
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
So I finished Seven Blades in Black by @SamSykesSwears and it's easily one of the best fantasy books I've read all year. Fun, kinetic, surprisingly emotional, and super agressive. Sal reminded me of Charly from The Long Kiss Goodnight and that's ALWAYS a good thing. #amreading
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Roger McNamee is a former mentor to Mark Zuckerberg and an early investor in Facebook. He says the company has become a threat to democracy because its business model is "based on effectively monopolizing attention" and preys "on the weakest elements of human psychology."
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
Cleanliness is king, my friend.
Replying to @wes_chu
I cooked some chicken last night that left a char on the bottom of my pan and that's making me sad.
The news today is making me salty as the dickens. But I just found out that the family down the street has two French bulldogs they like to walk at the same time I like to walk so things are looking up.
In reply to @SamSykesSwears
No, Samuel. You are. You're neat.
Replying to @wes_chu
Hey, thanks, Wes. I think you’re neat, too.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
In courtroom gang trials, a common witness intimidation tactic is for gang members to line the back of the courtroom as a silent threat.
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
Hey @SamSykesSwears I think I just talked my unofficial book club into reading Seven Blades in Black next...
In reply to @wes_chu
Oh weird. This person just blocked me. I have literally never interacted or tweeted to her before.
The @housegop are now physically obstructing the impeachment inquiry. Their stunt today will not deter us from holding @realDonaldTrump accountable. And it won’t stop the witnesses they’re seeking to intimidate. We will move on and justice will roll down like waters.
Replying to @RepSwalwell
How are you going to get to the bottom of anything when you won’t even enforce laws being broken in front of you?
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
House Republicans, who spent weeks wailing about "process" to distract people from Trump's abuses of power...

...just formed a mob to break into a secure room, stop a hearing, and carry phones into spaces where they are banned because of classified information.
On a happier note, here’s a beautiful baby brush tail possum we rescued and nursed back to health 🖤
Sam Sykes Retweeted ·  
You’ve been visited by the Halloween moose. May god have mercy on your soul.
it’s zany how people keep breaking laws with no consequence even after democrats keep saying they won’t enforce the laws that’s just wacky I sure hope someone solves this mystery
In reply to @MykeCole
Steve has good friends. I totally get why he's kneeling reverently to them.
Replying to @wes_chu @MykeCole
that’s why they’re a phalanx, which is Latin for “really good friends”
The invasion of a SCIF by unauthorized persons isn't protest -- it's a Federal crime with serious #natsec implications. Lethal force is authorized to defend SCIFs. This isn't a joke. Next time Gaetz & his merry band of felons try this stunt, they should be ready for consequences.
Replying to @20committee
"Next time" means it is a joke. No one's going to enforce the laws, so they'll break them at will.
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