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Analysed 18,487 tweets, tweets from the last 161 weeks.
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Last 50 tweets from @TheOnion
Yeah, Yeah, Nation Gets It, We Rapidly Approaching End Of Critical Window To Avert Climate Collapse Or Whatever bit.ly/3kukqiX
 
Long overdue reforms are finally coming to the nation’s fictional police forces. bit.ly/31yvzXC
Effects Of The Nationwide Protests Against Police Brutality
theonion.com
 
MYTH: Your brain is inactive during sleep.

FACT: Your brain uses those precious hours to pursue its own interests and hobbies. bit.ly/3knlG7z
Sleep: Myth Vs. Fact
theonion.com
 
‘Yeah, We Could Invite Friends Over And Call It A Supper Club!’ Says Couple Unknowingly Brainstorming End Of Own Relationship bit.ly/3ik23eU
 
So-Called Vegetarian Always Kills, Devours Chicken Whole Whenever She’s Drunk bit.ly/2ZpuiB2
 
If you have a question you’d like to submit to The Topical, just use the #LesliesMailSack or get it tattooed on your forehead and you can ask host Leslie Price in person. topical.lnk.to/Ep130
 
Freshman Who Would Have Fallen Through Dorm Window First Weekend Sad To Miss Out On College Experience bit.ly/2Z7xUc7
 
Study Finds It Would Be Extremely Satisfying To Have Intercourse With An A-List Celebrity bit.ly/38l1wFL
 
For more world-renowned reportage, visit theonion.com.
 
5 Things To Know About Instagram Reels
 
MLB Announces Players Will Now Be Quarantined For 14 Days Between Bases bit.ly/31ypc6D
 
TikTok Apologizes After Inadvertently Giving Platform To Thousands Of Theater Kids bit.ly/3a65L8S
 
Elliott Abrams Defends War Crimes As Happening Back In The ’80s When Everyone Was Doing It bit.ly/3idtTt8
 
Where income goes to become disposable. Shop the Onion Store today. bit.ly/3fIeDCN
 
Lipstick-Covered Water Bottle Clearly Got Some Action Last Night bit.ly/33Ge2zg
 
In reply to @TheOnion
Don’t forget to subscribe to The Topical wherever you get your podcasts. Otherwise host Leslie Price will get furloughed. He'll still have to read you the news everyday; Onion Public Radio just won’t pay him. Really it’s worse for him than for you, but still bad all around.
 
New York Attorney General Files Suit To Dissolve NRA bit.ly/3fE7a7R #WhatDoYouThink?
 
Dow Skyrockets After Coronavirus Begins Trading On New York Stock Exchange bit.ly/3ihRvNk
 
Man With Obnoxious Voice Has Been Violently Killed Thousands Of Times In Imaginations Of Others bit.ly/3gPqPmA
 
New Smoke Detector Only Alerts You If You’ve Got Decent Shot Of Getting Out Alive bit.ly/2DtE91C
 
The Onion’s Guide To QAnon bit.ly/2CbPsLs
 
Cardboard Fan In Stable Condition After Being Hit By Foul Ball bit.ly/3gD1ZXd
 
From The Archives: George W. Bush Debuts New Paintings Of Dogs, Friends, Ghost Of Iraqi Child That Follows Him Everywhere bit.ly/3gCPHhx
 
NASA Announces Plans To Launch Chimpanzee Into Sun topical.lnk.to/Ep131 pic.twitter.com/V05nHvE7kl
Replying to @TheOnion
Don’t forget to subscribe to The Topical wherever you get your podcasts. Otherwise host Leslie Price will get furloughed. He'll still have to read you the news everyday; Onion Public Radio just won’t pay him. Really it’s worse for him than for you, but still bad all around.
 
‘Run! Dear God, Run!’ Screams Woman Who Forgot About Sourdough Starter As Doughy Tendril Wraps Around Throat bit.ly/3knw2EA
 
NASA Announces Plans To Launch Chimpanzee Into Sun topical.lnk.to/Ep131
 
The Greatest NBA Teams Of All Time bit.ly/31xBLPH
 
Grocery Prices Spike During Pandemic bit.ly/30BGksX #WhatDoYouThink?
 
Older Cousin Thinks It About Time To Have Uninformed Sex Talk With Area 8-Year-Old bit.ly/3fBKsNQ
 
On today's episode of The Topical, hear why the future of this podcast could depend on locking each one of our employees in the office and never letting them leave work ever again. topical.lnk.to/Ep130
 
 
Visit theonion.com/?utm_campaign=… to see more from the standard bearer of global journalism.
 
Cash-Strapped NRA Forced To Shoot Dozens Of Redundant Employees bit.ly/3kkagl7
 
Facebook Launches TikTok Competitor bit.ly/2PvTxgu #WhatDoYouThink?
 
Timeline Of Mars Explorations
 
Enable your crippling caffeine addiction with this awesome mug. bit.ly/3fED4Rz
 
NRA Receives Massive Funding Increase From Donors Held At Gunpoint bit.ly/2PxJTKa
 
 
 
U.S. Officials Hurt Saudi Arabia Would Try To Develop Nuclear Weapon Rather Than Asking Nicely For One bit.ly/3gyGBCw
 
Depressed Michelle Obama Purchases Copy Of ‘Becoming’ To Inspire Her bit.ly/31mbWSq
 
Aching Desire For One True Love Separated By Fate Still No Match For A Good Porkin’ bit.ly/3fDkSrA
 
Orkin Introduces New Extinction Service For Eliminating Pesky Animal Species bit.ly/2XxRexG
 
Minneapolis Announces Plan To Replace Police Officers With Thousands Of Heavily Armed Social Workers bit.ly/3a1fE7X
 
Defensive Chicago Police Officer Perfectly Capable Of Disappearing Protestors Without Help From Homeland Security bit.ly/3fwkafL
 
Disney Announces Plans To Release ‘Mulan’ Directly Into Americans’ Consciousness bit.ly/3b29sfx
 
Kid With Coronavirus Gets Classmates To Sign His Lungs bit.ly/3kkG1ur
 
Former Spanish King Goes Into Exile bit.ly/33wSq8s #WhatDoYouThink?
 
Man Struggling To Pierce Orange Peel With Fingernail Under Impression He Could Kill If He Had To bit.ly/30tyIsn
 
Perverted Little Boy Asks To Sleep With Parents bit.ly/2Xyi6hg
 
 
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